Walk Journals ~ October 3

The seventh season begins.

It feels as though a new path is beginning.  It's the seventh season of walking.  According to my Map My Walk app, I've walked 1,375.74 in total.  Really?  Excuse me for a second; I'm taking a minute to marvel at myself.  And actually, that doesn't count the times the app malfunctioned and didn't add my miles.  Since April 2012 there's been 3 pairs of sneakers, several sizes of t-shirts and other workout wear, 4 sets of earbuds and 2 iPhone apps to help me stay motivated.

Lately, it's been a huge struggle.  First there was maybe some (self-diagnosed) sciatica and now there is some serious knee pain.  And maybe it was all tied up in my knee from the beginning.  I'm sure I should be seeing someone with an actual medical background and getting some professional diagnoses.  But I'm really afraid and reverting to doing what I used to be so good at:  avoidance behavior.  Because, if I don't find out what's really going on or wrong here, maybe it will just go away.

And there's the intellectual struggle:  I know I need to find out what's up.  For my own good and to get back on track.  So that I can get back to 7-10 miles a day as opposed to 3-5 miles once or twice a week which is all I've managed in the last month or so.  But there might be some down time when I find out ... physical therapy (which I don't have much faith in, based on absolutely no first-hand experience), scary injections or something more involved.  I've never so much as broken a bone; being "laid up" would be a totally foreign experience.  So I keep putting off calling the doctor, any doctor.

These walks have meant so much to me.  They helped me regain my health in so many ways  Physically, I'm more fit than I ever dreamed I'd ever be again and although I'm not as flexible or sculpted as when I taught aerobics (many, many moons ago), I feel great.  At least until my knee gave out, I did.  Mentally, I think I have more control of my emotions, almost never have "down" days and see most of life through a pretty positive lens now.  

I've seen bits and pieces of my town up close and have discovered a lot about what a special place it is.  The tiny lakes (there are at least five of them) and the river, the ponds and wooded trails, the spring and the old canal ... they provide an ever changing backdrop that help me think, that cause me to wonder at their natural beauty and help quiet my busy mind so I can organize my thoughts.  

I've listened to hours and hours, probably days and days, of music.  I've developed a new taste for pop music that really feeds me and fills a place that was empty for a lot of years. The walking coupled with the music (and particularly the music of Gavin DeGraw, who coincidentally dropped into my life around the same time as the walking) probably saved my life.  

My last walk was on Thursday.  It was the first time in over a week that I left work in daylight and my knee felt pretty good so I  hit the road and put in 4.5 pretty slow miles, up to the pond, around the back of the park, over the wood bridge where two folks were fishing and back into town to visit with my river.  By the time I reached home again, it was pretty apparent that I'd gone a couple miles too many.  And I paid on Friday with a lovely limp and swelling that lasted through Sunday.  Stairs were a challenge all weekend long.

Late afternoon light on an early fall afternoon.

I miss it.  I miss being out there on a daily basis, sometimes even twice a day.  I miss the energy that came from being in sunlight--whether a lot or barely a glimmer--for a couple of hours a day.   I miss how I could hop out of bed in the morning.  Lately, I've gone back to dragging myself to wakefulness.  I miss being strong enough to resist my boss's bottomless bowl of chocolate.  I'm self-medicating with chocolate several times a day these last couple of weeks.  I miss being able to say "I never have fries" with that.  I got dinner from that cute little Wendy girl tonight.  Walking increased my strength in every area of my life.  And while I have plenty of resolve first thing in the morning, it rarely lasts beyond mid-morning.

The master of excuses has resurfaced and inhabits my frame and my brain once again.  Too many deadlines by day, too many evening commitments by night.  Weekends filled with events of my own choosing (some for fun, some for community service--which is also my fun, truth to be told).  Every day crammed with "things to do" and no time left over for calling doctors, shopping for  healthy food, finding alternate ways to burn calories while figuring out the knee ailment.  

There.  I know what to do.  I just have to get out and do it. 

My river with tinges of autumn beginning.

~~

Walking "apps" I love:

Map My Walk:  Measures distance, time, pace, split time, calories burned, announces your progress at each mile, can be paused, allows you to team up with friends, save routes, gives you weekly and monthly reports.

Charity Miles:  Measures distance, time and pace, can be paused.  Unique in that miles are sponsored by generous corporate and private donors.  Before walking, choose a charity from their list and watch how your miles add up.  $.25 for each mile walked goes to the charity you've chosen.  Walk for a different worthy cause each time or stick with one and support it every time.  You're walking anyway--why not walk for good?

Playlist for a Thursday afternoon:

WPLJ 95.5 radio and ...

New music from Gavin DeGraw from the album due out next week (October 15 ... Make A Move):

Best I Ever Had

Who's Gonna Save Us (video from a performance I was at, taken by my friend; my view of the stage that night)

Walk Journals: September 14 (Walking is Good for the Heart)

I'm walking in Boston today.  I arrived late yesterday afternoon for a weekend getaway.  It's MixFest 2013, a free concert in the park sponsored by Mix 104.1, a Boston radio station.  I was here last year too.  Because, if you haven't guessed by now, Gavin DeGraw is one of the performers.  But that's for a different set of thoughts and impressions ...

I'm looking forward to spending time with my daughter too.  But she's pretty busy, having started a new job this week.

I'd wanted to walk last night when I arrived but just as I checked in, it began to pour.  My hotel is attached to a shopping mall ... so that's where I walked.  Except that shopping doesn't qualify aerobically and carrying bags isn't exactly weight training.

So I roust myself out of bed early for a Saturday and set off for the Public Garden, my favorite place to stroll.  Along the way, I pass Tico, the restaurant where my daughter had worked until recently.  I've eaten there a few times now and I really like the menu.  It's one of several restaurants owned by chef Michael Schlow and even though she's not with that restaurant group any more, I'll likely continue to drop in for margueritas and lobster tacos.  And the fried manchego cheese.  No wonder I need these walks ...

In the park I head for the 9/11 Memorial.  It's only a couple of days past the anniversary and so it's only fitting that I spend a minute or two there.  When I come upon the low granite wall with all of the names of local people who perished in New York that day, I am unprepared for the flowers and wreathes that are lovingly placed there.  I don't know why ... of course there'd be lots of flowers this week.  There are often small bunches of flowers left there but I've never seen the whole wall lined with them like this.  I stop to photograph the name of the one whose name is inscribed here whom I knew.  His family attended my church.  I remember his rambunctious, smart, curious boys--they were so little then.  They must be teenagers now.  Maybe in college.  I offer a silent prayer for them and their mom.

Making my way to the other end of the park, I glance up at the Four Seasons, wondering if my favorite singer is staying there.  I'm not sure but I have my suspicions--forensic tweet reading from last year points that way.  I'm listening to the song he released this week as I walk, Who's Gonna Save Us.  Standing at the traffic light, waiting to cross over to the Boston Common I notice a lady glancing sideways at me.  Suddenly I realize I'm singing along.  Aloud.  As in out loud.  Loud being the operative word.  I shrug.  This isn't the first time people have been unwittingly been subjected to my voice (which actually isn't that bad ...).  Although I majored in music, I went out of my way to not sing--especially solo--the entire four years I was in college.  I've just never felt that strong in the vocal department.

Narrow old steps lead from street level up to The Marliave

I pass through the Common.  It's not as pretty as the Public Garden but hugely historic.  Little shelters are being set up for some community event and food vendors are already grilling giant slabs of meat and more.  There are homeless folks sleeping in small groups everywhere.  It's disheartening to see but Boston is no different than any other community and we, as a people, haven't given the issue of homelessness the attention it needs and deserves.  I think I'm headed in the direction of my daughter's new place of employment, The Marliave.  But, even though I'm a Girl Scout Leader, I head off in two wrong directions before deciphering the map in my phone correctly.  Good thing I've never had to teach orienteering.  I finally find the right route and before long I'm standing in front of a really old building in one of the oldest parts of town.  The Marliave is a French restaurant named for it's founder, a Parisian immigrant who opened the establishment in 1885.  It's in a narrow street, Province Street, once known as Governor's Alley as it was the route between the Statehouse, a block or two away, and the residence of the Governor of the Massachusetts Colony before the Revolution.  I marvel at my daughter's opportunity to be working in such a historic venue--at all the ghosts that must linger in these cobblestone streets.

The tomb of Paul Revere

While finding the restaurant I'd passed the historic Granary Burying Ground where Paul Revere is buried.  I decide to take a side trip through the site and learn that several signers of the Declaration of Independence, Samuel Adams, Ben Franklin's parents and many other folks of historic significance are buried there too.  The headstones are tightly packed with tiny child-sized headstones layered close to their parents'. It's a beautiful place filled with stories of the ones who conceived our country and stood up for their experiment called democracy.  It's a place that forces you to be grateful for those men and women who've shared their lives in public service, whether historical or quietly local.  One large tablet simply read:  Freeman Tomb, 1807 Benj. Bangs.  It's positioned right next to Paul Revere's.

Prayers for peace.
Pray for peace.

Looking at my watch, I realize there's not much time before I have to get ready for the concert so I hurry back through the Common and Public Garden.  Across from the Garden is Arlington Street Church, a Unitarian Universalist Congregation.  The church was completed in 1861 and was the first public building in the Back Bay neighborhood of Boston.  I'm struck by the hundreds of ribbons tied to the old wrought iron fence that surrounds the church (like many of Boston's beautiful churches).  Randomly I read a few.  They're all tributes to those affected by the bombings the day of the Boston Marathon; they are prayers for peace, for love and for a future free from fear.  Toward the end of the fence, a plastic bag filled with blank ribbons hangs along with a bucket of pens.  It's an invitation for all of us to add our prayers.  I don't stop to add a ribbon but for the second time today, I offer up a silent petition for peace and understanding.

Four and a half miles.  Pretty comfortable ones with barely a trace of sciatic trouble.  Four and a half miles packed with significance, history, proud feelings for someone I love dearly.  Meaningful miles today.

Gosh, I love Boston.

Concert Diaries Chapter Twelve - Yonkers (And It Didn't Even Rain)

 This post is for Ulla, who I will meet one day 

either on this side of the Atlantic or hers!

Thanks for encouraging me!

Yonkers, New York.  Every time I hear the name I think of Barbra Streisand in Hello Dolly expounding on her relationship with Horace Vandergelder ... I just do.  And I always think of what a big deal it was for the other characters in that story to go into the Big City--New York--from out in the country--Yonkers--when in reality, Yonkers is like 20 minutes from uptown.

I drove to Yonkers on Sunday.  It's not that far from me.  I went by way of Manhattan to pick up my concert friend, KC.  Not having driven in the City in decades since my dad, my son or my ex had been doing that drive for me, I was somewhat nervous but there was no need.  It was a good drive, not much traffic, only one roadblock in New York and a quick ride to the Raceway from uptown.  Empire Casino at Yonkers Raceway was the setting for my latest Gavin DeGraw concert adventure.  We had great seats in the fifth row, dead center.  The concert was outside near the track and terrible weather was predicted.  My bag was stuffed with a rain jacket and umbrella.  Because ... as you know, if it's Gavin and it's outside, I'm bound to be wet.  I'm bad luck for Gavin fans outdoors.  I'm sure it has something to do with my concert karma.

However, by the time we found our seats, blue skies were just beginning to be visible between the wispy clouds and there was some sunlight peeking through.  It was going to be a lovely night.

Contributing to the overall loveliness was the large number of twitter friends who'd come from all over to see Gavin.  Just as though we were the chorus of his current single, Best I Ever Had, we drove from Virginia, Maryland, New Jersey, all over New York, Massachusetts, and Connecticut.  More about that later.

Collin Smith

Warming up the sold-out crowd for Gavin was singer/song-writer Colin Smith from Dublin, Ireland.  Later Gavin explained that they'd been friends and mutual admirers of each other for quite a while, having been signed to J Records around the same time.  His songs were genuine and lovely and heartfelt.  He is definitely someone worth seeking out and seeing again.  I love this consequence of being a Gavin fan ... he has led me to Michael Franti, Andy Grammer (from him to Chris Wallace), Colbie Caillat, Hillary Williams, Butch Walker, Train (from Train to Ashley Monroe).  From other Gavin fans I've learned about Tyler Hilton, (from Tyler, Dion Roy), Ernie Halter, Jamie McLean and others.  It's like throwing a pebble in a musical pool with the ripplings of other artists coming back to you on waves.  I'm sure this is not a unique phenomenon, the expanding of one's musical library because of one particular artist, but it's one of my favorite by-products of my fascination with this particular singer.  It probably helps that I lived under a rock for 20 years so catching up makes everything and everyone very new and exciting.  I hope I'll find Colin Smith singing somewhere near me again.  I'd love the chance to hear a longer set.

It's hard to explain the electric anticipation that flows through a crowd of Gavin DeGraw fans before he comes out on stage.  When he's headlining, it's like a huge surge that grows and grows until at last you release all that energy with the elation that comes when he appears, lately through a haze of smoke.  Earlier this summer, when we Gavin fans were scattered around huge venues in pockets between Train and The Script's fans, it was a different sort of feeling.  It was as though the electricity was bouncing from fan to fan willing our enthusiasm on those around us--willing them to see what we see and feel what we feel.  By the end of those opening sets, the uninitiated were made aware of his talent, great humor and ability to bring people together.

Tonight, although the venue is small compared to the other places I'd seen him this year, that familiar electricity is in the air.  And although I'm there with KC and with other friends scattered all around me, when Gavin DeGraw takes that stage, I am all alone.  Just me and the music and the bliss of feeling filled with an overwhelming sense of happiness.  I know they understand this and take no offense to my mentally shutting myself off from all else.

It was a fabulous long concert with old favorites plus the three new songs he's playing in advance of the new record dropping in October.  The old songs are reworked and sound fresh and amazing.  The new songs are some of his best work, especially Who's Gonna Save Us, which has taken my breath away every time I've heard it.  He brought back Crush (must have done that for me) and I Need a Dollar/Chermical Party (that was for my friend in Michigan I think) and sent all the younger girls over the edge with his cover of Justin Timberlake's Mirrors while meandering through the crowd.  He finally wound up his tour of the venue right in front of us, standing on someone's seat to sing right in our midst.  I know he (and his summer tour mates) had done that over the course of the entire tour but it's pretty amazing to have that voice within four feet of you.  The new quiet introduction into Chariot is stunning in its initial simplicity.  He sang Run Every Time and Soldier and Candy.  I still smile at the stories, most of which I can now recite along with him, which are woven between the songs, slightly tweaked and tonight with full-on "acting"--sort of ... well, not full-on, but hilarious nonetheless.  And charming.  Have I mentioned charming?

The band was in outrageous form as always.  Billy Norris, so young and talented moving easily between his differing guitars and singing flawless harmonies, James Cruz with his understated mastery of the bass sang more backup tonight than I've noticed before, Ian O'Neill going into his "zone" with the perfection on drums that we know him for and Eric Kinney who's as serious a keyboard player as any I've known (and basically, all the musicians I know play keyboards of one type or another).  Together with Gavin they make an amazing combination.  A lot of us are missing Jimmy Wallace on keyboards too but I think Eric is as good and understands Gavin's brand as well as Jimmy did and does.

The first encore for this evening was just Gavin singing a solo rendition of Belief, a song from his first record that obviously, even ten years later, touches a chord in him as well as his audience.  I would love to know how he came to write this anthem to love and loyalty.  I wonder if whomever inspired it knows that it was she and if she's heard it live ...  And then his huge hit, Not Over You, a musical representation of a universal feeling.  There were a couple of guys sitting almost in front of us singing at the top of their lungs--I loved seeing that.  Gavin's audiences are full of women of every age and the men they drag with them.  These guys were clearly there because they wanted to be and they had such a good time.

And then it was over.  With many thanks and humble appreciation, he left the stage to return to the buses that had been rented (by him or the venue, hard to tell) for the occasion.  We hung around near the stage hoping he'd come out as he often does but since we were within driving distance of his home town there were friends and family in the audience and I think he spent some time catching up with them.

United

We took big group shots and pictures of smaller groups and finally made our way inside to chat, relive our favorite highlights and reconnect (or in some cases, connect for the first time) with friends from near and far.  It's such a pleasure to have this network of friends to indulge our obsessions with--people who require no explanation, who in many cases can finish your sentence or voice your unspoken thoughts.  We're all connected by our common love of this singular performer and are also bound by our common wish for all good things and success to come his way.  We criticize his PR people and label for not putting in enough effort on his behalf (although most of us have no clue how this business really works from the inside); we analyze lyrics and discuss his enormously gifted band while scrolling through the dozens and  dozens of photos taken that night.  From where we were sitting in the restaurant, we watched the buses pull away finally.  I wondered which airport ... EWR?  LAG?  Who would spend some time in New York?  Who was going right back to Nashville?  Time and twitter would tell ....

We all have the same problem: can't eat before a show so
make up for it afterwards.

I was thrilled to get caught up with people I'd met from my first big meet-up at last November's show at the Paramount on Long Island, people I now connect with on Facebook and Twitter.  Other special women I'd met more recently in Virginia Beach.  One person, a retired teacher from New Jersey, approached me and reminded me we'd connected somewhere, either on Twitter or one of the concert platforms (BandsInTown, maybe?)  I went alone to my first (and many other) Gavin shows but at this one I touched base with 15 people that I've found so much in common with because Gavin brings us together ... and then it's we who form and nurture these friendships.

Oh ... and it didn't even rain!

~

Colin Smith ~ Love
Gavin DeGraw ~ Who's Gonna Save Us*

*Or Save Us (waiting for the album so we know for sure). So amazed that T could take this video while I was standing beside her with my heart in my throat.

~

The next day Billy Norris held a fun twitter fest and answered four of my questions which was a first for me.  He'd earlier tweeted out his airport frustrations which he often does when passing through New Jersey so I asked if he'd been through EWR that morning.  But no ... it was LAG.

~

Playlist - 9/1/13:

In Love With a Girl / Radiation / Make a Move / Crush / Run Every Time / Soldier / Candy / "Thank You" / Sweeter / I Need a Dollar-Chemical Party / Chariot / Follow Through / Save Us / Mirrors-I Don't Want to Be / Best I Ever Had
Encores:  Belief, solo / Not Over You